if you do not actively desire sex but still have sex that may be self-harm. i’ve done this. it sucks and in the long run will fuck you up when or if you actually desire sex.
having sex for the sole purpose of “pleasing a partner” is sex that may traumatize you. sex should be enjoyable and it shouldn’t place any burdens on you and if you don’t want sex then don’t force yourself to have sex
the whole concept linking being open-minded, liberal, and free-spirited with being sexually available to men and having no sexual boundaries is an absolute tragedy. almost every woman i know has been traumatized or harmed by this ideology in some way, and it is being pushed on girls at increasingly younger ages
i would also like to point out that the idea that it’s cooler to not be emotionally attached in sexual encounters, not have expectations, etc. and be casual about sex and love is also harmful to women and puts the onus on them to change themselves, to criticize themselves for being loving and feeling things deeply, rather than for men to stop being sex-obsessed and devoid of human emotion
“I studied art in Florence, that’s why I thought a lot about the meaning of this painting and I thought she’s the perfect woman. So, I talked to myself ‘Why not?’ Why can’t I be Botticelli’s Venus? I can be perfect even with all my imperfections. In the end, all women can represent this figure.”
